The Secret to a Happy Marriage is…

I’ve always said that the secret to a happy marriage is to “choose wisely.” I think it’s a commonly known, and accepted, principle that your life is, for the most part, a culmination of the choices that you’ve made. It’s no different in marriage.

I think it’s impossible to choose a life partner to complement you if what you’re really looking for is someone to “complete” you. In order to confidently choose a life partner to complement you, I believe you have to be complete in and of yourself ...not needing or looking for someone to fill a void that is really your job to come to terms with. Looking for someone to complete a void within you simply puts too much pressure on the other person to make up for a deficiency that is not their responsibility to fix...and they will surely fail trying.  As Julia Roberts said, “you want a partner not a project.”

Be a partner...partners complement your life, they are not a crutch or enabler. They pull you up and pull you through and vice versa.  They help you to become better versions of yourself by cheering you on, supporting and encouraging you, but it’s your job to do the work, not theirs. 

Marriage is about complementing each other’s lives and creating one together that is exponentially better, not worse, than it otherwise would have been. I’ve often said that I can make myself perfectly miserable ...I don’t need someone in my life to help me with that.

So choose wisely, I know I sure did!

Happy 20th anniversary to my perfect complement. ❤️

#twentyyears
#happyanniversary